It's been a crappy day. Both literally & figuratively.
I don't know what is up with the girls lately, but they have been awful listeners. Ignoring what Marc or I tell them to do, saying 'no', and just being down right disobedient.
I cannot tell you how many times I've raised my voice, sent them to a time out, & taken away privileges. And today was no exception. Here is just one tiny example of what I'm talking about.
Me: Kennedy, please go potty.
Kennedy: no!
Me: Kennedy, I told you to please go potty. Your dancing, you need to go.
Kennedy: no, I'm not going to.
Me (raising my voice): Kennedy: I'm not going to tell you again. Go potty!
Kennedy (yelling): I'm not going to!
Me: go to your room!
And then the feet stomping & hysterics start.
Now, off to drown this crappy day away in some chocolate. Or ice cream. Or both.
If any of you have dealt with this and/or have any suggestions on how to deal with such behavior, I would really appreciate any & all advice. Thank you in advance.
And this afternoon after constant bickering & taking things from each other, they both got sent to their room & a special night of making homemade pizzas was taken away. The hysterical crying started again.
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| {Yes, it was another pajama day for Ashby today} |
I just don't know what to do anymore. We talk to them about their behavior & the consequences of being naughty but they just don't seem to get it. Or maybe they just don't care.
Tonight after getting out of time out, I asked Kennedy why she was acting the way she was. She said she was tired. She uses that excuse all of the time (even at 9:00 in the morning). She gets 12+ hours of sleep at night so I know that isn't always the case.
All I know is that Marc & I are fed up with their behavior & something needs to change immediately.
And to top it off, somebody pooped in the bathtub tonight (Kennedy). Oh how I love cleaning out poop & disinfecting the tub after an already crappy day. *insert eye roll*
If any of you have dealt with this and/or have any suggestions on how to deal with such behavior, I would really appreciate any & all advice. Thank you in advance.
I would love to see what advise pol give you cause I'm in the same boat with Kaylee.
ReplyDeleteI hope things get better hun
Thank you for the sweet comment on my blog
So sorry Jessica! I have been dealing with Sheridan saying "no" to me lately. I finally decided that I was not going to tolerate it and I began giving her a consequence the FIRST time she did it, with no warning. That worked!
ReplyDeleteWe read the best parenting book not long ago called Parenting by the Book. It is a Christian book, written by a psychologist. Really good, I recommend it.
I wouldn't worry so much if they don't seem to care about the consequences, as long as you are consistant. What do they love to do/have? Write those down and then use them as consequences.
Praying for you!
Colleen
Ugh, I feel your pain! We've had lots of hysterical crying here too lol.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was working as a school psych I always gave parents the standard lecture about being consistent, if you ever say no you need to follow through immediately, never cave because if you cave just once they will always try to push the limits to see if you'll ever cave again, take away privaleges, etc.......then again I did most of that lecturing before I actually had my own kids haha. So I know it's a lot easier said than done! Part of it is just the age, and some kids are more prone to show their emotions with tears (I was one of those kids.) Just try to ignore it and put them in their rooms. Don't give them attention or speak with them until the tears are completely gone. Good luck!
oh mercy, cousin! we have SO BTDT! sometimes it still feels like we're doing that - and Brendan is 10! :o
ReplyDeleteone thing Mark and i learned early-on in this journey is that we talked too much. i thought we were doing the "responsible parent thing" by discussing behaviours, choices, and actions, but an older parent took us aside and said, "a little less talking and a little more action would go a long way with your boy..." and do you know what? this guy was RIGHT. :o so now we give one warning and then come the consequences. BOOM. we do talk quite a bit after the consequence (whatever it might be) about the behaviour, the choices leading up to the behaviour, and how it might end differently in the future.
B still tries the "i'm tired" part of the excuse-making, too. sometimes it's legit - as he's aged, we've been less-consistent about being home by 730/800p to get him to bed (he's an early riser, so an early bedtime is a must for him). but our constant reminder to him is that *he is still responsible for making wise choices, even when he's tired.* hey, when *i'm* tired, i still have to be the grown-up and deal ... and i'm not raising a little boy, i'm raising a young man who is growing (quickly, i might add!) in to a man. he's got to learn these things while the consequences are fairly benign - at least, this is the way Mark & i see it.
i hate bad days (had an EPIC one last week), but thankfully, they don't tend to last too long. i hope you rested well and are ready to face today with a renewed sense of purpose and determination. :)
if you want a good book to read, check out _Creative Correction_ by Lisa Whelchel. it's got some really good stuff in it - and it's from a faith-filled perspective. :)
hugs from the desert!
I agree with what others have said about being consistent.
ReplyDeleteI remember reading in the Love and Logic parenting book it says to give your child choices. I know that for myself before reading the book that I said "no" a lot to my daughter so she ended up doing the same. When I would give her choices, within reason, that made her be in control.
If you haven't read that book, I strongly recommend it!